365QOD- Day743

“’If there is a  God, how can he allow this to happen?  How can he let so many people suffer?’

Several years ago, I married a man of strong faith.  One day he sent an email to me that said this: ‘On a street corner I saw a cold, shivering girl in a thin dress, with no hope of a decent meal.  I got angry and said to God, ‘Why did you permit this? Why don’t you do something about it?’ God replied, ‘I certainly did something about it.  I made you.’”- Lisa Ling Give of Yourself advice

I remember reading this portion in a book and it immediately made me think how we want God to take care of all of our problems.  Is that fair to us?

Yes, you read that.  If we give away that power then we are powerless to help each other.  As the story illustrates then why does God need us?  He created us to do what?

We are the tool for most of his miracles.  We are here to help one another.  God is there to cover the big stuff.  

Today’s question is:

“What small miracle did you help God with today?”

365QOD- Day656

"Thanks.... Giving" - my thought

As I get older I am starting to dislike Christmas.  Not because of the religious aspect but the shopping drive.
It seems like we are starting to go from Halloween straight into Christmas.  The reason?  The drive to make a buck is pushing it earlier and earlier.

Most retail outlets do not go into black(start making a profit) until after the holiday sales. So for them it makes sense to keep moving it up.

But we have crossed a line with the Thanksgiving night/Early Black Friday sales.  People are literally leaving the family and the food in order to get a jump on the sales.

Many are probably saying so what?  Well, I think it is pretty sick.  We are more focused on the gifts than the people that those gifts are usually intended for.  (It is no different than sending text or email to people next to you instead of talking with them.)

When things get changed into material only, they tend to loose meaning and eventually die out.  It is the old how vs. why debate.  We celebrate with money(the how) but no longer understand the meaning(the why).

Today's question is:
"Did you Give Thanks?"

365QOD-Day570

"My first theory is that people like to give and receive uplifting advice.  Let’s face it – our society is built upon blowing smoke up each other’s asses ( in layman’s terms, giving gratuitous or insincere complements or general good feelings)…. However, our collective unwillingness to engage in a reality check has gotten us in lot of deep doo-doo."- Carol Roth

I found this line while reading the Entrepreneur Equation book.  It is the truth.  We always try to be nice and polite and give people the "best" spin.  Then there are others who like to be brutal with their opinions. 

I always say that the truth is somewhere in the middle.  We have to use the sandwich approach.  Give people a  good point, followed by the bad point, and lastly finish with a good point.  This usually helps the person to recognize that they are doing some good things AND something to improve upon. 

The ratio of 2 to 1 is OK.  In a previous post I discussed the suggestion by another author who recommended 6 to 1 ratio for a marriage to succeed.

Again, somewhere between 2 and 6 is the right answer for a particular situation and person you are dealing with.

Today's question is:

"Have you offered someone a sandwich?"

365QOD-Day426

"While walking along a each, a young gentlemen saw someone in the distance leaning down and picking up something and throwing it back into the ocean.  As he got closer he noticed that the figure was that of an elderly man, picking up starfish one by one and tossing each one gently back into the water.  The young man smiled and asked, "Why are you throwing starfish into the ocean?"  To this the elderly man replied, "The sun is up and the tide is going out.  If I don't throw them in, they'll die.

Upon hearing this the young observer commented, 'But Sir do you realize that there are miles and miles of beach and there are starfish along each mile?  You can not possibly make a difference!'

The elderly man listened politely.  Then he bent down, picked up another starfish and threw it into the ocean past the breaking waves and said, 'It made a difference for that one.'"

This story was on the back of a RE/MAX index card.  I changed the young man and elderly gentlemen positions in the story.  It made more sense to me that an elderly person would be wise enough to be concerned with the affect on one starfish.

In our youth we are almost most often concerned with ourselves.  It takes time to realize that the effect we have on others helps to create or destroy relationships.  Like the story above, we have to realize that every interaction is like a starfish with at least five legs:
1. how we see that person (now)
2. how that person sees us (now)
3. how we want that person to see us (future)
4. how we want to influence that person in this situation (near future)
5. how we want the relationship to unfold in the far future (future)
(I am sure you can come up with your own version)

It seems that majority of the interaction should be future focused.  Maybe with a long term view the interactions would be more nurturing.

Today's question is:
"Did you nurture someone today?"

365QOD-Day369

"I glow"- anonymous

Can you glow?  As Wayne Dyer has said many of times, "We are not human beings having a spiritual experience BUT spiritual beings having a human experience".

So if we are spirits how do we use this?  I believe that one way is to imagine a warm glow inside you and try to project this outwards.  I believe you will see an immediate change in your interactions with people.

Today's question is:
"Are you glowing?"

365QOD-Day256

"When you give and then expect a return on your investment, you are an investor.
When you give and expect public recognition in return, you are a self-promoter. 
But when you give only for the love of giving, you are a generous person.


The word generosity stems from the Latin word generous, which mean "of noble birth"
Rich have given to poor without expectation of repayment.  This lies at the heart of what it means to be truly noble." from Today We Are Rich

I believe that in many life situations we find ourselves an investor, self-promoter, or a generous person.  We should strive to be noble but often we will fail.  It is OK to fail as long as we strive towards that goal.

If in the end we are judged as a giver then our lives will be noble. 

Today's question is:
"Today, during different situation ask yourself what type of giver are you?"

365QOD-Day237

"Without a rich heart, wealth is an ugly beggar"- Ralph Waldo Emerson

How much is enough?

If you are financially free(FF) but you still obsess about getting more and more then when will you reach the enough point?  How about transcending the getting and moving into the giving side?

The FF person may be confident in their ability to earn money.  However,  if a FF person lacks the spirit of generosity, they'll never be able to fully share.   The paper worth is only in the present moment, over time it will fade away.

I believe that is why wealth is a single generation phenomenon in the US.


Today's question is:
"Are you begging?"

365QOD-Day236

"Complete possession is proved only by giving.  All you are unable to give possesses you."- Nobel prize winning author Andre Gide

Recently I gave away a bunch of clothes.  I just simply took what I did not wear for the last year and put it in the donation bins at my local supermarket.  I felt lighter.

Before moving  a few weeks ago I threw out a ton of papers and junk.  I felt lighter.

What other things possess you?

Are you are thinking too much about your money problems?  Maybe you need to get creative and find ways to donate to a cause that lifts your spirits.

Do you feel a lack of respect from others? Think about giving respect to someone who deserves it.

Why do this?

Your subconscious is paying attention to your actions.  By giving what you feel you lack tells the subconscious that there is a surplus.

Today's question is:
"What is possessing you?"

365QOD-Day235

"I get a natural high"-my reason for running

What other types of good highs are there?

 In the book The Healing Power of Doing Good - Allan Luks gives the answer.

Luks studies thousands of volunteers and discovered that they achieved a
"helper's high".  This high was very similar to what a a person experiences after a long run.

Helper's high created a "euphoric" feeling that, unlike "runner's high" lasts for several weeks.

The most amazing part was that Luks also found that the volunteers who later reflected on their giving were refreshed by doing so.

Today's question is:
"Have you gotten your helper's high today?"

365QOD-Day209

"I am not a pessimist.  I am a realist"- Anonymous

I am reading a book called Today We Are Rich.  In it the author discusses the idea of devil's advocate.

He strongly urges that we stop playing that role.  It does not do what we intent to do with it.  It challenges the creator of an idea in a condescending way.   As if they have not taught about what you will suggest.

A better solution is to be an angel adviser.  You want the person to succeed.  So you ask them what are some of the things that they have considered that might prevent them from hitting their target. Then you listen...Don't provide a reality check.  Just listen to what they have considered.  Maybe in the end you could nudge them towards a new idea.

Today's question is:
"Who are you serving as an angel adviser?"

365QOD-Day156

"He has the bluest of eyes"-A woman admirer

In an audio book I just got through listening to, Paul Newman was recalled as an actor.  In it he told a story of his father as his hero.

Paul Newman was more that just an actor.  He did more than just act.  He created.

Newman created something that would last for a long time.  He created a company to sell items under his name.  The company started with a salad dressing.  They added pasta sauce, lemonade, popcorn, salsa, and wine, etc.

Newman's policy was to donate all proceeds, after taxes, to charity.  By 2006 the company had donated 250 millions.

Today's question is:
"What can you do today to benefit others?"

365QOD-Day71

"One can not find simplicity by making things complex"-Anonymous

Have you noticed that we often add things to our lives?  I do believe that we should have an abundance philosophy. 

Although I believe in abundance, I do believe that we must cut things out of our lives.  At least for any new item we bring into our lives we should consider removing one item.  Find something that someone might get enjoyment out of and give it away.  Give it away anonymously if you can. How about one item per day for a year?(Sounds like an idea for another blog)

Today's question is:
"What is one item that you can give away today?"

365QOD-Day57

"When you can or you can't give"-Anonymous

I watched an episode of the Secret Millionaire with James Malinchak tonight.  It brought tears to my eyes.In the story James plays an undercover millionaire and volunteers in a community to see who is doing good.  The show was based on Gary Indiana.

http://www.hulu.com/watch/224538/secret-millionaire-james-malinchak-gary-in#s-p1-so-i0

I happen to live right next door to Gary.  I lived there from 1979-1983.  It was a great place then but it is a very different place now.  However, people are people. Even in the roughest place you will find kindhearted people deserving of support because they are doing wonderful work.

From the show, the one person who left the biggest mark on James was Coach Tony Branch.  I know Tony.  He has couched my daughter Stefani when he and Coach Curry wanted to see if sixth grade girls could be as talented and teachable as the mostly high school girls that they normally coach.   I believe that the short time they spent coaching her has improved her as a player tremendously.

Coach Branch and Curry are wonderful men and deserve support.  They influence and mold these girls into great basketball players who go on to receive scholarships.  They are givers and not takers.  James gave the group $50,000.

James also gave Tony $25000.  I am not surprised that Coach Branch had a difficult time receiving the $25000 from James.  He is a proud man who is a giver.  Even though he was unemployed at the time, when someone tried to recognize him it was difficult.

To all the givers in the show, my hat is off to you for doing the good work that you do.  To Coach Branch and Curry my eternal THANKS.

Today's question is:
"Are you a giver or a taker?"